A typical day in the life of a mother of a 'learning to self-feed toddler' looks a little something like this...
Breakfast - 8:00am - There are bits of food covering the dining room floor, the table and chairs, my clothes and every inch of my daughter.
Snack -10:00am - There are bits of food covering the dining room floor, the table and chairs, my clothes and every inch of my daughter.
Lunch - 11:30am - There are bits of food covering the dining room floor, the table and chairs, my clothes and every inch of my daughter.
Snack - 3:00pm - There are bits of food covering the dining room floor, the table and chairs, my clothes and every inch of my daughter.
Dinner - 5:30pm - There are bits of food covering the dining room floor, the table and chairs, my clothes and every inch of my daughter.
You get the general idea.
After each sitting, it will take me about 10 trips to the sink and rinses of the washcloth and a change of clothes (and perhaps a bath) to clean up my daughter and another 10 trips to the sink and rinses of the washcloth and a broom to clean up the rest of the mess. No wonder my hands are so dried out that my fingers tips are cracking! I suppose I could wear rubber gloves, but who wants to walk around wearing rubber gloves all day (as there really would be no point in taking them off.)
I have made this transition sound a lot worse than it actually is. In all honesty, it is a lot of fun wathcing my daughter learn how to handle a spoon. As with anything in life, practice makes perfect! She now knows how to scoop her food out of her dish and get the spoon into her mouth. The spoon is often upside down by the time it reaches her mouth and the contents in her lap, but at least she is trying and getting better at it each day! I have found baby sign language to be very helpful when it comes to mealtimes. Lilah can tell us when she wants more (and say please) and when she is done (although she often resorts to the "throwing food on the floor" technique to let us know she is done when she doesn't feel like signing.)
That being said, the transition doesn't come without frustration. One of the forces driving the desire to self-feed is increasing independence. Translation: "I don't want your help anymore so don't even try it or I will just get upset and do everything in my power to block my mouth in an effort to prevent you from putting anything in it!" I often worry that my daughter isn't getting enough to eat. I have to keep telling myself over and over again: "She will eat when she is hungry. If she doesn't eat much at this meal or today, she will make up for it at the next meal or tomorrow."
It is also frustrating when I work hard to prepare something for her to eat only to have her reject it completely or mush into oblivion such that it has to be thrown out. I hate to waste so I often end up eating what she doesn't (unless it has been mushed into oblivion) which I always told myself I would never do because I thought it was disgusting when other people did it. (I will have to stop that little habit eventually because I remember reading somewhere that mothers often gain weight when they eat what their child doesn't in addition to their own food.)
As with any transition, this one is gradual. You really have to be on your toes and be willing to try a number of different techniques (or tricks) to get that food where it needs to go. Some days Lilah will happily let me shovel food into her mouth. On others she will be fine with me loading the spoon, but she will want to put it into her mouth. On others she will want the spoon and the bowl all to herself and will not accept any assistance whatsoever. Similariy, a trick will work one day, but not the next and then eventually not at all. It used to be the case that if we put a piece of cheese or pasta on top of whatever was on the spoon, Lilah would gladly let us spoon feed her. Now, she insists on putting the cheese or pasta on the spoon herself. Before long, she will want to do it all herself.
Before long, Lilah will be happily feeding herself AND getting almost everything into her mouth. Eventually there will be less of a mess to clean up and we won't require a change of clothes after every meal. Until then, I need to stay calm and enjoy the ride.
Sunday, February 13, 2011
Tuesday, February 1, 2011
Travelling with a toddler: packing, security and passing time
A couple of weeks ago, my daughter took her 8th plane ride as part of our trek home after an extended holiday vacation! I can’t believe that she has now been on more flights in her first year of life than I had been on in the 30 years before she was born!
Given that we have done a significant amount of travelling over the course of the last year, particularly on airplanes (and in many cases without my husband), I thought I would write another blog about our experiences for others that might be travelling for the first time with an infant or toddler. (See my June 23, 2010 post for more about travelling with an infant.)
As you can imagine, packing has become significantly easier because I now know what I really need and don't need to bring, particularly in my...our...I mean, Lilah's carry-on (let's be honest, I carry very little for myself these days...lip chap, a few tissues and identification is about all I can lay claim to in the carry-on bag.)
In the early days, packing the carry-on bag was a challenge, or so I thought. That was before Lilah started eating solid food when in actuality it was SO much easier. It just seemed harder because at that time I was still figuring out what I needed. All I really needed in those days was enough diapers to make it through the trip, wipes, one or two favorite (small and quiet) toys, a book or two, Lilah's blanket and my breastfeeding beads and shawl. I should mention that although you might think you can predict the number of diapers you might need on your trip, packing as many as you can fit is always a good idea for a couple of reasons. You really never can tell what might come up (or should say out) AND I just found out today from a friend that diapers in the airport are ridiculously expensive! If you happen to be stranded in the airport for any reason you don't want to have to pay close to $10.00 for 2 diapers...definitely worth squeezing in as many as you can fit.
These days, I pack many of the same things AND all of the food Lilah may or may not want to eat while we are travelling. The food and everything that is needed to feed a toddler (spoons, washcloths, bibs) now takes up the majority of space in the bag. Luckily, carry-on restrictions for liquids don't apply to baby food. I have carried water in her sippy cup, jarred food, fruits and snacks through without a problem (I do always keep everything food related together in a zip lock and take it out of the carry-on bag when we go through security to avoid any problems.) Every toddler is different, but my advice is to pack small amounts of a variety of things so that if they happen to decide that day they don't want to eat something, you have other options. Eating is also a good distraction while you are waiting in lines, at your terminal or in the plane so taking more snacks than you would typically feed your little one doesn't hurt.)
Speaking of security...this can be a challenge when you are travelling alone with your child. This may sound odd (keep in mind I am an organizational freak), but I make it a habit to find a bathroom before I go through security and take off my belt, watch and coat/sweater and undo my shoes to make the process easier. I also take off Lilah's coat/sweater and shoes ahead of time as well (yes, you do have to remove their shoes and any coat/sweater/sweatshirt they might be wearing!) If everything that is excess has been removed and is packed neatly away before you go through, it is less stuff you have to worry about removing while holding your child and about grabbing on the other side.
Once you are on the other side, passing the time until you board your plane can be a challenge. On our most recent trip, we found a place in the terminal where we could clearly see the planes landing and taking off. Lilah was obsessed with watching them and we passed almost 2 hours with that little activity. Walking up and down the terminal has also proved to be a fun time waster (although holding on to mommy's hand and keeping hands off of the floor were key to making this work). Finding a book store in the terminal is great because they often have a kids section where you can quickly read through a couple of board books to pass some time. Lastly, eating is always a classic way to pass time.
I have really enjoyed the travelling we have done over the last year even though I started out thinking it was going to be stressful and challenging. Lilah is a great little traveller which helps immensely and I would have no hesitations about taking her on another trip. If you are going to be travelling with your little one, my advice is to pack carefully and just relax and enjoy the trip! Remember, our kids feed off of us and if we are stressed out and anxious, they are going to be too!
Given that we have done a significant amount of travelling over the course of the last year, particularly on airplanes (and in many cases without my husband), I thought I would write another blog about our experiences for others that might be travelling for the first time with an infant or toddler. (See my June 23, 2010 post for more about travelling with an infant.)
As you can imagine, packing has become significantly easier because I now know what I really need and don't need to bring, particularly in my...our...I mean, Lilah's carry-on (let's be honest, I carry very little for myself these days...lip chap, a few tissues and identification is about all I can lay claim to in the carry-on bag.)
In the early days, packing the carry-on bag was a challenge, or so I thought. That was before Lilah started eating solid food when in actuality it was SO much easier. It just seemed harder because at that time I was still figuring out what I needed. All I really needed in those days was enough diapers to make it through the trip, wipes, one or two favorite (small and quiet) toys, a book or two, Lilah's blanket and my breastfeeding beads and shawl. I should mention that although you might think you can predict the number of diapers you might need on your trip, packing as many as you can fit is always a good idea for a couple of reasons. You really never can tell what might come up (or should say out) AND I just found out today from a friend that diapers in the airport are ridiculously expensive! If you happen to be stranded in the airport for any reason you don't want to have to pay close to $10.00 for 2 diapers...definitely worth squeezing in as many as you can fit.
These days, I pack many of the same things AND all of the food Lilah may or may not want to eat while we are travelling. The food and everything that is needed to feed a toddler (spoons, washcloths, bibs) now takes up the majority of space in the bag. Luckily, carry-on restrictions for liquids don't apply to baby food. I have carried water in her sippy cup, jarred food, fruits and snacks through without a problem (I do always keep everything food related together in a zip lock and take it out of the carry-on bag when we go through security to avoid any problems.) Every toddler is different, but my advice is to pack small amounts of a variety of things so that if they happen to decide that day they don't want to eat something, you have other options. Eating is also a good distraction while you are waiting in lines, at your terminal or in the plane so taking more snacks than you would typically feed your little one doesn't hurt.)
Speaking of security...this can be a challenge when you are travelling alone with your child. This may sound odd (keep in mind I am an organizational freak), but I make it a habit to find a bathroom before I go through security and take off my belt, watch and coat/sweater and undo my shoes to make the process easier. I also take off Lilah's coat/sweater and shoes ahead of time as well (yes, you do have to remove their shoes and any coat/sweater/sweatshirt they might be wearing!) If everything that is excess has been removed and is packed neatly away before you go through, it is less stuff you have to worry about removing while holding your child and about grabbing on the other side.
Once you are on the other side, passing the time until you board your plane can be a challenge. On our most recent trip, we found a place in the terminal where we could clearly see the planes landing and taking off. Lilah was obsessed with watching them and we passed almost 2 hours with that little activity. Walking up and down the terminal has also proved to be a fun time waster (although holding on to mommy's hand and keeping hands off of the floor were key to making this work). Finding a book store in the terminal is great because they often have a kids section where you can quickly read through a couple of board books to pass some time. Lastly, eating is always a classic way to pass time.
I have really enjoyed the travelling we have done over the last year even though I started out thinking it was going to be stressful and challenging. Lilah is a great little traveller which helps immensely and I would have no hesitations about taking her on another trip. If you are going to be travelling with your little one, my advice is to pack carefully and just relax and enjoy the trip! Remember, our kids feed off of us and if we are stressed out and anxious, they are going to be too!
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